The phrase I am trying to avoid this year!
Along with ‘back to reality’ and ‘back to the real world.’ I find that we associate so many bad feelings with coming home from holiday. Of course it’s lovely to have time away, time to unwind, fun in the sun. But why does it all have to come to such an abrupt end? As soon as we touch down onto the tarmac at the airport we go straight back to being tense, worried, miserable beings. Automatically thinking about work and chores, all the things we have to catch up on and it’s such a shame! That lovely holiday you’ve just experienced falls away and you’re left feeling empty and unfulfilled.
So my aim, after coming back from Spain on Saturday was to avoid using those negative terms and instead find a little bit of beauty and happiness in each day. Of course some of those days have been harder than others, but as soon as I notice a negative pattern with my thoughts, I try with all my might to find a little positivity. Whether that be a warm mug of coffee in the morning, a tv show to look forward to (hello love island) or something as simple as the sun shining through the trees. I’ve been working very hard on grounding myself over the last few weeks and it’s paying off!
If you know me in the real world then you’ll be aware how terrified I am of flying, I’m talking full on panic attacks; snot, tears, hyperventilating, the works. I’ve been struggling with this for as long as I can remember. This year I’d had enough! If you’ve experienced a panic attack then you’ll know that it completely wipes you out, it normally takes me a day or so to recover. I didn’t want to ruin any part of this break away so I worked really hard on overcoming this during the build up to the holiday. I was focusing on grounding myself (like I mentioned earlier), lots of yummy yoga and I took the time to meditate. I know these activites aren’t for everyone but they’ve all really helped with my day to day anxieties, so I thought why not try it for flying? Safe to say it worked! For the first time in a long time I got on to an aeroplane, I focused on some breathing techniques and not one tear or panicked breath left my body! Both to Spain and coming home. I’m at extremely proud of myself and I don’t care who knows it!!
The second ‘win’ of the week was pulling myself out of what threatened to be a big depressive episode. Not easily done. I found myself comparing my body to other women during the third day of our break and it really got me down. I was filling my mind and body with negative thoughts; not slim enough, not tanned enough, not enough in any shape or form. I could feel myself sinking lower into this darkness. As I was about to just give in and start restricting my diet I decided to pick up one of the books I had brought with me:
‘The Goddess Revolution’ by Mel Wells
An amazing book filled with self love and positive points about food and tips on how to love your body. I thoroughly recommend it to anyone who may get a little down about their body from time to time! In fact I recommend it to everyone because it’s fabulous! With that book and a little time to myself I got through something which had the potential to ruin our holiday.
So all in all I’m really happy with my progression, this time last year I struggled to find happiness during breaks away and it’s such a relief to go on a holiday and be able to wear a bikini without worrying, to be able to go make up free without feeling ugly, to get on a plane and soothe my anxieties and to spend time with Tony without slipping into sadness.
I’m aware this post has been mainly about my accomplishments, but hey, I’m proud and it’s good to share!
So guys, next time you go off on your adventures don’t forget to stay in the moment, enjoy every moment. Every bite of yummy food, every grain of sand between your toes, every smile shared and every bit of beauty. After those holidays, when you get back to your home, don’t automatically think yourself into a bad place with work and responsibilities. Try and focus on little bits of happiness each day. Because we’re in control, we have the ability to change our thought pattern, to change our way of thinking, we have the ability to make each day as wonderful as the last.